What today’s seniors want most is to age in place. What they fear most is to lose their independence. But what they’re least likely to ask for is the kind of help that will keep them comfortable and safe at home. That’s why it’s often up to the adult children of aging parents to look for the signs that their elderly loved one needs help at home.

Neglecting those signs will likely lead seniors to the kind of dependence that most would like to avoid. "Seniors often don’t recognize when they require help," said Jim Madison, owner of the Home Instead Senior Care office serving the counties of Grand Traverse, Leelanau, Benzie, Kalkaska, Manistee, Wexford and Missaukee. "That’s why adult children should identify where their loved ones need assistance. Home Instead Senior Care has made this process easier by providing a list of simple, look-and-see signs that adult children can use to identify the types of services their loved ones might need. Providing seniors assistance with a few basic tasks – such as meal preparation, light housework, companionship and medication reminders – often means the difference between whether they stay at home or go to a facility. And that kind of independence is very important to seniors’ overall happiness."

The latest report in the AARP’s Beyond 50 series confirmed that seniors’ number one fear is loss of independence. "The vast majority of people 50 and older do not require long-term assistance at any given time. However, most people will require assistance at some point in their lives, and most families will face these issues with their older family members," according to the report.

Seniors’ expectations for remaining at home are high. In a survey conducted late last year by Home Instead Senior Care, 83 percent of seniors surveyed said they are very or somewhat likely to remain in their homes rather than move to a care facility. Home Instead Senior Care, the largest provider of non-medical home care and companionship for the elderly in the U.S., sends CAREGivers to seniors to help keep them independent and at home for as long as possible.

"Most people, in general, want to live at home or independently in a retirement community," said Mary Hujer RN, MSN, geriatric clinical nurse specialist for the Cleveland Clinic. "Who wants to lose their independence? The best approach to staying self-sufficient is to plan ahead and accept help when necessary." Hujer explained that some concerns of aging, which jeopardize independence, could include isolation, weight loss, safety and transportation.

• "First, research shows that routine socialization is one of the key aspects of successful aging so it’s important for seniors to find social activities," she said.
• "Second, poor nutrition that leads to weight loss can be caused by multiple factors, some of which may be social. Up to one-third of patients I see experience some weight loss at one time or another," she added.
• "Third, safety becomes a real concern for seniors who are suffering illness or mobility problems. To prevent falls, consider putting grab bars in bathrooms, placing bright yellow tape strips on stairs or painting the toilet seat yellow," she said.
• "Finally, transportation is a big challenge for those seniors who are forced to give up their keys. Communities can offer the best programs in the world, but if you can’t get the individual there, what good are they?" Hujer said.

Oftentimes, seniors are reluctant to seek outside help because they want to keep doing things the way they always have. "Dementia, which includes Alzheimer’s disease and other cognitive problems, may impair seniors’ judgment as well as their memory," Hujer said. "That’s when, with an older adult’s input, a caregiver can intervene to promote a safe environment and help ensure quality of life."

"By helping adult children identify the types of resources that a senior might need to remain independent at home, we hope that families can avoid some of the stress that goes with caring for an aging loved one," Madison said.

10 Look-and-See Signs of Aging

• 1. Look in refrigerator, freezer and drawers. Has food spoiled because mom can’t get to the grocery store? Does she have difficulty cleaning tight, cluttered places?
• 2. Look over the grocery list. Has your loved one’s declining health prompted her to purchase more convenience and junk foods, and neglect proper nutrition? Is she losing weight?
• 3. Look on top of furniture and countertops. Are dust and dirt signs that household tasks are becoming more difficult for your parents?
• 4. Look up at fans and ceilings. Has the inability to lift her arms and climb stepstools prevented your loved one from cleaning soot and grime from high places? Caution your senior not to climb.
• 5. Look down at floors and stairways. Have shaky hands spilled drinks and food, soiling vinyl, wood, carpets and walkways? Are frayed carpets, throw rugs, objects and furniture creating tripping hazards? Does dad’s bad knee put him at greater risk on cracked sidewalks and with broken stair rails?
• 6. Look under beds and sofas. Is your senior having difficulty organizing old newspapers, books and magazines, which are creating a fire hazard?
• 7. Look through the mail. Is mom’s dementia causing her to forget to pay bills and answer correspondence?
• 8. Look below bathroom and kitchen sinks. Is poor eyesight making it difficult for your elderly relative to read medication labels and to properly store cleaning materials? Is he forgetting to refill medications and to take them on schedule? Check the refill date against the number of pills in the bottle to help determine if your loved one is taking medication regularly. Or call the pharmacy.
• 9. Look at your senior’s appearance. Is clothing dirty and unkempt, and is your loved one neglecting personal hygiene?
• 10. Look to your parents’ neighbors and other close friends to find out about their daily routine. Are your seniors at home more, watching television and avoiding stimulating conversation and companionship?

* * * For more information about Home Instead Senior Care, contact Jim Madison or Ann Madison at (231) 938-3001or visit the company’s Web site at www.homeinstead.com

Jim Madison