The Caregiver’s Emotional Well-Being
After a long day of taking care of your loved ones, you may experience a variety of emotions. Love for your elderly family member and the satisfaction you derive from helping may mingle with feelings of resentment about the loss of your privacy and frustration developed from believing that you have no control over what is happening. You may also find it hard to accept the decline of the special person for whom you are giving care.
Your feelings are not something that should be neglected, because they have a lot to do with the way you view and cope with caregiving. All feelings are reasonable, even if you have some negative ones such as anger and frustration. It is important that you express your feelings to family members and/or friends rather than keeping them to yourself. Recognizing your emotions is the first step towards resolving the problems of stress.
You may also want to see if any of the following statements apply, which may help to assess your level of caregiver stress:
- I can’t get enough rest.
- I don’t have enough time for myself.
- I don’t have time to be with other family members besides the person I am caring for.
- I don’t get out much anymore.
- I feel that my days are wasted.
- I have conflicts with the person I care for.
- I have conflicts with other family members.
- I cry every day.
- I worry about having enough money to make ends meet.
- I don’t feel I have enough knowledge or experience to give care as well as I’d like.
- My own health is not good.
If any of these are concerns for you as a caregiver, it may be time for you to seek additional help—both for the senior as well as yourself.
You may want to consider the following:
- Join a caregiver support group. In addition to offering useful information, it provides a forum for caregivers to come together and share their feelings in a supportive environment. Participating in a support group can help manage stress, enable you to exchange experiences, and improve your skills as a caregiver. Sharing coping strategies in a group setting lets you help others while helping yourself.
- Set realistic goals for yourself as a caregiver. Caregiving is probably only one of several of conflicting demands on your time. Recognize what you can and cannot do, define your priorities, and act accordingly.
- Turn to other people for help—your family, friends, and neighbours. Sometimes, you can’t deal with all the problems by yourself, because it will only exhaust you. You may want to confide in someone close to you, and discuss problems and issues that you are facing and seek for opinions or advice.
- Prepare a list of tasks for anyone who may offer assistance: such as running an errand for you, preparing a meal, taking the senior for a ride, or taking children for the day. This can take a load off your shoulders, and at the same time, get your family members more engaged in caregiving.
- Make sure to take care of your own needs. You must be at your best if you are to provide the best care. Take time off to continue pursuing activities that you enjoy or that provide stress relief. Exercise, eat right, and get plenty of rest—and don’t feel guilty in the process. Caring for you, the caregiver, is just as important as caring for a loved one. In this way, you both will enjoy the benefits of your personal well being.
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